#MNR: Lieutenant Al Giardello
Hello world. It’s your guy Mr. Monday, back on this platform on my favorite day of the week, spewing my mixture of prudent wisdom, borderline insanity, and at times outright ignorance into the crowd. It seems so long since we last ciphered. No worries, the gang is back again, errthang already pre-rolled so we can jump straight the fuck off into it. If you need time to get your aromatics lit go on ‘head. We’ll park the wheels and let you do what you do…alright…now let’s get to it like that MF from The Shawshank Redemption that dug his way up out that prison cell. We’re locked in. Bet. I’m a stir the pot a bit to set this shit smooth off.
I saw the homie Megan Rapinoe at the White House last week, championing the conversation of overall equality and equal pay for female athletes. Let’s begin with gender equality and the NCAA: y’all some clowns for that footage we saw of the workout equipment and setup y’all had in place for the women’s tournament. Fat Albert and the boys had a better setup at the junkyard. It was disgusting to see, and even more disgusting to know that some well-paid dickhead (Eazy the Block Captain voice) actually signed off on letting that shit rock. Look, we know that that y’all don’t give a B-52 flying fuck about women’s athletics outside a few major conferences and universities along with a handful of sports. We think it’s disgusting. We’ve been saying it. I’m a pragmatist. I know that y’all don’t care. But the common damn sense in me is thinking that y’all should at least try to act like y’all give a fuck. At least give them some basic equipment. You know – some bench, incline, and squats stations, dumbbells, treadmills, ellipticals, stationary bikes, whirlpool access – the bare minimum at least. Smh. Y’all too bigoted and dumb to at least make shit look status quo. I’m not a box of Kleenex. I’m not here to wipe tears. I’m not Shirley Chisolm. I’m not here to stand in front of a mic and campaign for shit. But even if I were an ignorant, sexist, discriminatory type of MF, I’d at least have set the ladies straight with the gym equipment. If we gon shortchange and scam, we should at least look the part of a decent establishment. You NCAA MF are weird.
I’m not off Megan. I salute who and what she is to the sport of soccer and equality. She’s USWNT strong. She’s a champion. She’s been very active when it comes to fighting the wage fight. I’m a keep it short and simple. I don’t know why there’s even a discussion about pay with regard to both men’s and women’s national teams. There’s nothing to say. Megan’s absolutely wrong. Fuck she talmbout equal pay? She’s out of her mind. WRONG! The USWNT shouldn’t be paid what the men are paid. THEY SHOULD BE PAID MORE. The men’s team is ASS. They didn’t qualify for the Olympics for the third straight games. There are adolescents who haven’t lived to see Team USA play men’s soccer in an Olympics, and adults (I’m adults) who haven’t lived to see them medal. It’s fucking ridiculous. The women are reigning World Cup champions. They’ve won three of the last four Olympics. They dominate the sport on this side of the equator and big pond. They deserve their just cut. They deserve a king’s ransom.
Now, before y’all nominate me for president, I’m not carrying this water all the way from the creek to the hut. I can’t agree with the WNBA players and parts of their salary arguments. Do they deserve pay raises? Absolutely. But should they be paid proportionately to NBA players? Fuck no. They play a lot fewer games and bring in much less revenue, from ticket sales to apparel. They don’t have the television contract the NBA does. This is an open and shut argument. Like I said, I don’t bring sentiment to a gunfight. I bring hollow points. Please cut the delusion.
After being stuck for six days, a large container ship named Ever Given that had completely blocked the Suez Canal was freed this morning. Now, I know I may need to do some backtracking before I proceed, cuz not all of y’all are the sharpest knives in the drawer. A canal is an artificial waterway constructed to allow the passage of boats or ships inland or to convey water for irrigation. The Suez Canal is located in Egypt between the Mediterranean Sea and Red Sea. If it weren’t for the canal, ships would have to sail smooth around Africa to reach the Americas, Europe, and the rest of the world. Now, understand that this wasn’t some lil tugboat. It wasn’t a Carnival Cruise ship. It wasn’t the Titanic. It was bigger. It was about the length of the height of the Empire State Building. That big MF was stuck stuck. Not moving. The salvage crew (a team of machine operators, engineers, tugboat captains, and other salvage operators) worked in coordination to help free the ship. Over the course of the six days, an estimated $55B in global commerce was lost due to the complete blockage of the canal. That’s a lot of paper being left on the table. Shit, I woulda nuked that MF to get the canal jumping again. I know, I know. That’s nonsensical. But that’s exactly the type of time I would’ve been on if I were missing out on paper because of that damn ship throwing salt in the game. But I know how business goes. I woulda just made youse consumers pay for my delay. Can we say tax?
I’m not gonna spend a lot of time on this because it’s so inconceivable to me that I feel like I’m my gpa and we’re in the ‘60s or something. What I’m getting at is Georgia and all the legislation that they’ve enacted to restrict the voting rights in the state. It’s trash, no ifs, ands, or buts about it. And yes, it was directed towards people of color. My advice is simple. Being that Governor Kemp has signed that trash into legislation there’s not much to be done (for now). What Black and brown folk need to do is educate their own on the changes so that they can be proactive and handle their business at the polls within the designated times and stipulations (like y’all did a few months ago). They may have made it tougher to vote, but y’all tougher than that. Y’all are beautiful, resilient folk. I’m no Democrat but I admire the way Ms. Stacey Abrams holds shit down in the Peach State. She gon get a plan together for y’all. Don’t let the devil discourage you from handling your business. Tough times don’t last. Tough people do. Trouble don’t last always.
Apple, y’all finally found a way to scare me into updating my phone every damn time. I used to ignore updates cuz half the time they fucked with some shit that I was previously able to do without a second thought. But now I can’t even do that because y’all keep telling the press that every update of late has been to counter some type of cyber fuckery that I’m not even in the ballpark of being able to explain yet am scared to death of. I don’t know all that technical shit. What I do know is that I don’t want any of my charge cards sponsoring some heifer’s online Neiman Marcus shopping spree or any of my private photos on full display on Facebook or in The Shade Room. So, y’all MF got me. I run like a hoe every single time y’all say there’s an iOS update. Damn! Are you happy now (Martin during his first proposal to Gina voice)? Smmfh.
I must say that this past Saturday’s URL Double Impact 4 was extra fucking fire! My queen and I thoroughly enjoyed the event…well, most of it. I’ll get to that in a second. But there were some great battles, with a certified classic included. The classic came from K-Shine/Lu Castro vs. Ave/Fonz. I can’t call a winner, other than us as a culture catching the collective W. That shit was super fire. Shine and Lu were on 1,000,000% energy and Ave and Fonz were punching like Hagler and Hearns. I’m watching that shit again soon as it drops on the app. The surprise of the night went to Arsonal/Kid Chaos. All the woke lyrical purists didn’t give them a snowball’s chance in Qatar against B-Dot/Real Sikh. But they went in there and out rapped the rappers. I didn’t say they were more lyrical. That’s impossible with Dot and Sikh on the same roster. But Ars and Chaos all-around out rapped them. They had better chemistry. The team of Geechi Gotti/Swamp, titled CCC (Compton-Carolina Cartel) versus Tay Roc and Eazy the Block Captain, titled Gunz & Gutta was extra crazy. Both teams came to rock, but the Triple C’s got extra busy. Their third-round angle, a flip of Roc’s third round against Official on Kings vs. Queens 2 a couple weeks ago, was absolutely ridiculous. Geechi and Swamp talked bad about those two men’s ladies. Couldn’t have been me. I woulda hooked off extra early. I wouldn’t have gotten paid my second half, plus about 50 Nutty Block Locs and a couple thorough South Cackalack niggas woulda rocked me to sleep. But fuck it, y’all not finna talk about my lady like that. Lmfao. Good shit. Geechi is def in my top five. Him and Math Hoffa in a couple weeks may get spooky for Math. We shall see. The NWX team of DNA and Don Marino was nice but wasn’t quite as nice as Rum Nitty and Jey the Nitewing. It was a good battle on both sides though. That boy Rum is an alien. That coming with two ladders together for DNA bar was the craziest shit I heard in a long time. Good fucking battle. And finally…the main event…was an absolute shit show. T-Top and Nu Jersey Twork demolished the team of Murda Mook and Calicoe (Murdaland). Murdaland was ill prepared (they later said they freestyled all three rounds) and underwhelming. Top and Twork completely smoked them in the first. Twork was upstairs with it. The second was closer but I still edge it to Top and Twork. Mook was in his feelings and talked through my nigga Top Bizzy’s part of the third round after Bizzy hit him with a kidney punch. In turn, Top did the same during Mook’s third. The shit got out of hand and became just plain weird. Mook was freestyling some big homie advice shit that we could tell was an obvious freestyle. It wasn’t really hitting cuz shit was already OD weird. Calicoe kept grinning in the background and saying he was out. The live mic caught Smack saying Mook fucked the battle up before the feed cut. The two went on Unkle Ra’s 15 Minutes of Fame later and gave some half-assed explanation. The shit was horrible and borderline cringeworthy. Mook and Cal should retire as a two-on-two and Brizz GOTTA come back so him and Mook can have that talk. Mook is still my guy but Saturday night was not it.
The trial of Derek Chauvin, the PIG who killed Mr. George Floyd, began today in Minneapolis. That’s all I have to say, other than FUCK THE POLICE. (Black Fist Emoji)
RIP to my real daddy, Yaphet Kotto.
#MNR: El Segundo
“Cuban Link, QB chain belong in the MoMA. So boomerang, you salute my 27 summers.”
Hi there. It’s Monday, March 22, 2021, the morning after the first weekend of the Big Dance, the field of 64 + 4, the NCAA Division I Men’s Basketball Championship tournament. My only question is a simple one: how many of y’all brackets are ALL THE WAY fucked up? I know, I know. Alluvem. Don’t ask about mine. I stopped torturing myself years ago. Oh well. Take that tournament paper, fold that bitch in half, fold it once mo’, and use it like a Scrabble letter holder to hold your chronic to break your buds up on. That’s about all that shit is useful for at this point in time. And hey, a tree died for that sorry ass bracket you “strategically” filled out, like you had done your pre-tourney research on Abilene Christian and Texas Southern. Get more than one use out of it. Not only are you being industrious, but you’re also doing your part to help the environment. It’ll lower your carbon footprint by 0.0000001%. You are appreciated.
Big ups to the #GOAT Nasir Bin Olu Dara Jones for his Best Rap Album win at the Grammy Awards. It was his fourteenth time being nominated. FINALLY! My guy was the damn Susan Lucci of the Grammys. Much respect to Freddie Gibbs and his legion of dedicated fanatics. I’m not mad at y’all anger in your guy not winning. Trust me, I know the feeling, so much that I’d been saying fuck the Grammys for the better part of the past two decades. That sentiment has not changed. Fuck the Grammys. Macklemore won a Grammy. That’s all that needs to be said. Salute to King’s Disease, the 2021 Grammy Award winner for Best Rap Album.
I’m not any type of police. I’m not a prosecutor. I’m far from a misogynist. I also call BULLSHIT on the 12 or so sexual misconduct allegations against Deshaun Watson. That man hasn’t been guilty of as much as farting in public in the past almost decade of being in the spotlight. He’s been a model citizen and darling to all those who’ve been a part of his football experience. Does that mean that he’s innocent of these allegations? No. Not at all. He could be as guilty as Ted Bundy. But what his near decade of civility has awarded him is the benefit of doubt until substantial evidence is presented. I’m not an all-out opponent of cancel culture. I am an all-out proponent of due process. This is America, isn’t it? Attorney Tony Buzbee plans to present all 12 “cases” to authorities in short time. Word is that Buzbee is a neighbor to the McNair family, owners of the Houston Texans, the team which drafted and currently employs Watson. Watson and the Texans are currently in the throes of an acrimonious split, sparked by Watson’s warranted distrust in the organization. The timing seems a bit fishy to me. BULLSHIT (Eazy the Block Captain voice)!
DISCLAIMER TO ALL DEMOCRATS: I’M FINNA PUT Y’ALL UP ON GAME.
The road to Election Night 2024 is shorter than you think. The 2022 midterm congressional elections promise to provide a vital glimpse into the future. We shall not forget 45’s displeasure with the 2018 midterm elections, when Dem’s overtook the House and won seven governors’ races. 11.5.2018 proved to be a minor stroke of foreshadowing for things to come in 2020. Dems parlayed that momentum and tRump’s senseless mishandling of the COVID pandemic into a win at the presidential level as well as overtaking the senate on a 50+1 tiebreaker. So far, so good for good old Sleepy Joe. Biden has been good on his word for the most part. The American Recovery Act has put much needed cash in the hands of suffering Americans in diverse ways. It has also met COVID vaccination head-on. Like I said, so far, so good. But a lot can change in four years. My folk taught me the same thing Chris Partlow and Snoop taught young Michael: always get there early. For me, that’s literally and figuratively. You should always be early to the job, obviously. But it also means doing your research ahead of time to see shit coming before it happens. I said all that to say this: DON’T THINK IT’S AN IMPOSSIBILITY THAT THE REPUBLICANS CAN WIN THE WHITE HOUSE BACK IN 2024. R’s are already trying their best to cook the books in several states (notably Georgia) in effort to suppress voting. And just because Biden’s numbers are looking good in March 2021, it doesn’t mean that they’ll stand the test of time. That’s obvious. GET TO THE POINT, MONDAY. Gotcha. I’ve done some research on who could be the one to get the nomination, assuming Big Cheesy isn’t either fit to or free to run again. I’ve eliminated Josh Hawley and Rafael Cruz for their antics post-election and on 1.6.2021. They played themselves. Kevin McCarthy doesn’t have the nuts for that type of battle. I don’t see any of the tRump offspring stepping up. I do see any potential wave from the gang being stopped by investigations pertaining to the tRump Organization. So who…I’ll tell you who. His name is Ron DeSantis, governor of the sunshine state of Florida. He is four days younger than me. His education speaks for itself: Yale undergrad, Harvard Law. He’s ex-military, a former JAG for the Navy. The fucker was even a member of the Little League baseball team from Dunedin, FL that made it to the 1991 Little League World Series as well as a baseball player while undergrad at Yale. DeSantis has three major things going for him: he’s young, he’s largely scandal free, and he’s down with Big Cheesy. This ongoing madness down Miami Beach aside (which will be attributed to unruly spring breakers), he’s also kept Florida 100% open from day zero of COVID without taking a major hit. In fact, Florida’s COVID numbers are in the same ballpark as California, a state that has more people and has been in some type of COVID protocol from jump. DeSantis is moderate enough to attract the “normal” Republican yet close enough to the radical tRump base to get them in lockstep as well. I saw how he made sure all the early COVID vaccines went to the wealthy communities first, and we all know how Florida Republicans carry it. There’s plenty of money down there and plenty of support that goes with it. Florida, a state that doesn’t have state income taxes (oh, you didn’t know?), never shut a door for the most part (Disney excluded), never reduced a capacity, and basically never stopped doing what it did pre-COVID. Lest we forget that both the NBA and WNBA bubbles were held in Florida. Say what you say, but business owners and free-spirited individuals love that type of governorship, and so do plenty of Americans. I’m telling ya (Big Boi voice)…don’t sleep on DeSantis. Anything can happen in politics. If the R’s gain hand in some type of way down the road, he’ll be the guy they push in front of the podiums. You heard it here first.
Like all human beings, I was troubled by last week’s spa shootings in Atlanta that resulted in the deaths of eight, including six Asian women. I won’t give the name of the white man who took those eight lives, as I never give extra press (attention) to the wicked. Like most, I disagree with some of the local law enforcement down there. I am quite convinced that the killings were ethnically motivated, making them hate crimes. I am familiar with laws and am aware that outside the LGBT community, it’s hard to convict the accused on hate crime statutes because there’s not many specific laws on the book. There’s a huge grey area that exists, somehow. It’s not like America has ever had any type of history of racial oppression and violence toward a particular ethnic group, right? There’s no way that America could be ill-prepared to prosecute ethnic-based hate crimes, is there? I’m a leave that thought alone. All sarcasm aside, I pray for Asian Americans and the perils they’ve faced in this country during COVID, all the ignorant hate. The shit is horrible. I don’t want any group of people being targeted and mistreated. Leave Asian folk alone. Now, I’m a take it a step further and say what’s on my mind. Asian Americans, we’ll stand with y’all on the basis of what’s right and wrong. Y’all don’t deserve to be targeted. At all. But I wouldn’t be all the way thorough if I didn’t call some of y’all out for the way y’all treat us. We’re not all criminals when we enter your establishment. Y’all may feel a way about me saying it, but a lot of this type of treatment has rubbed Black folk the wrong way for a long time, causing them to feel like they don’t want to show empathy toward Asian Americans. The bottom line is that everyone should respect everyone and treat them as they would treat themselves. But then again, if it was that simple, we wouldn’t have this type of shit going on in America. You know, senseless, wanton, racially/ethnically targeted murder. There’s a riot going on…my prayers go out to the families of the victims. At least one of the slain was a mother. Asian Lives Matter.
Scoop the merch. We got all you need to get your apparel up for the spring season. UnB. MNR. Boffum. To the projects I’m ghost shorty wop, one love.
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine understanding.
A MF like me checked the irs.gov site to see when Sleepy Joe and the Treasury Department were sending those fourteen blue faces my way. They don’t even have any information for me at this point. The last stimulus came to me via check. Check. Not direct deposit. A check. A damn check that came like three weeks after most people had already spent their six hun on whatever they pleased (deservedly so). I paid my tax. I filed a return. Okay, I didn’t file a return yet this year, but I did for 2019. It’s not like I missed the filing deadline. I have a month to the day. So why am I being treated in such a manner? I guess the moral of this story is to stay patient and be thankful. So that’s WTF I’m gonna do (insert pain and crying emojis).
I don’t know who needs to hear this but treat every single day of life like the blessing it is. You never know when calamity may come your way. It may not even be a calamity. It may just be an unwelcome change in routine that completely kills the vibe and your comfort zone. Things change constantly. That’s a given. At times change brings pain. But through it all, the ups, the downs, and in between, appreciate every second of this existence. We only get one chance to grace this beautiful earth. After we perish, we are only memories, memories which become fleeting in short time. I implore everyone to truly seize each and every day. Embrace it. And make sure you give your loved ones their flowers while they’re still alive to smell them.
The news of late has been ripe with coverage of the ongoing border crisis. Since Biden took office, there has been a sharp uptick of undocumented, parentless children arriving at the border seeking asylum and potential citizenship. Coverage also showed families who have been waiting to hear from immigration who have been camped at the border for as long as over a year now. They’ve lived in nearby tents, still hoping to receive an opportunity to become legal Americans. This is a crisis that did not begin within the past four plus years (I know what you’re thinking). But our last president built his platform on the backs of hopeful immigrants, painting them as cartel members, human traffickers, and rapists, all eager to cross the border illegally and continue their pillaging and plundering on our side of the wall – a wall he campaigned on fortifying. I still cringe when I hear “build the wall.” Children were separated from parents and held in camps, and reports of the conditions have ranged from harrowing to all out disgusting, obvious human rights violations. Many children have yet to be reunited with their parents. Sadly, this entire situation is a cluster fuck. On one hand, there’s the travesty of what’s taken place during the 45 administration. On the other hand, you have an influx of immigrants, encouraged by Biden’s victory and empathetic rhetoric, that are traveling in droves to the border in hope of citizenship. In the literal middle is the border, immigration, and law enforcement, overwhelmed with bodies, bodies which largely cannot be properly accommodated. What to do with the parentless children? How many persons in all can be properly given the opportunity for citizenship? It’s looking like it’s going to take diverse federal agencies in tandem to make this work, or at least begin to sort it all out. God bless all those folk, all those dreamers. Especially the babies.
When I first spoke on the impending disaster that is Governor Andrew Cuomo, he had but two accusers (smh). As of the last time I checked MSNBC earlier today, his count stood at seven, the latest coming from a journalist who echoed the approach I spoke on in the original Cuomo blog (smmfh). It just so happens that I was watching Jake Tapper on YouTube (I don’t watch CNN anymore – I have my reasons), and I saw a piece he did the other day on Cuomo that dealt with fishing. I had to look up the meaning of fishing (NOT the trout and catfish type). It’s actually short for fishing for a reaction, which is EXACTLY what I said Cuomo and his type of shitheads do. They throw seemingly lighthearted comments out and see what sticks. They probe women, not to get to know them better as individuals, but to try to sneak attack the pussy. They either A) don’t have the heart to ask a woman straight up to lay with her or B) use this as an escape route if ever questioned about their actions. A speaks for itself. B does as well, yet still requires further explanation. I said that the first thing Cuomo would do is scream that he’s never assaulted anyone. Of course he hasn’t (who knows). That’s not his play. He’s gonna play the subtle role and see if a woman gets the point. Now, there’s nothing wrong with this in everyday life. Plenty of men (self-included) have used this method. But anytime it’s used by a man in a position of power, it immediately becomes absolutely wicked. A man knows that a woman knows exactly what he’s trying to do with the subtlety and innuendo. She either receives it or rejects it. Cool. But like I said a couple weeks ago, it’s different when a man in power does it. Now, it’s still the same scenario. He knows that she knows what he’s trying to get at. The fucked up part is that he also knows that this approach forces her to make a painful decision; career or reputation? She knows that if she declines, it’s likely over for her in that career path. She knows he’ll hate on her every time she’s up for any type of impactful promotion or job. She knows that if she acquiesces, her reputation is potentially tossed in the trash. Your name is your name. Once you lose that, it’s so hard to get it back. She also knows that it will affect her mentally. She has to look in the mirror every day. Life is what it is. There are plenty of women who are up on game thoroughly and will accept this type of bullshit as part of the game, some shit to be expected when an ambitious, career-minded woman is trying to reach the top of her profession. These women may say fuck it and go for theirs. They may go ahead and give the boss what he’s been daydreaming about for all that time. They’re fine with that. I’m not judge or jury. The reality of professional life is that the casting couch exists in damn near every profession, not just acting. Talent or no talent, many women have been forced to make serious choices in their quest to the top. That shit sucks ass. There’s also the Anita Hill(s) of the world. I need y’all to do that research on your own if you’re not already up on game. Fuck Clarence Thomas. As a competent journalist, I must reiterate that Governor Cuomo has yet to be charged with any crime. He deserves his due process. I can’t be a hypocrite. But, if there is a big-time investigation on the horizon and he is found guilty, fuck him. He deserves whatever he gets.
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#MNR: March Madness
Howdy, y’all. How y’all feeling? That was rhetorical. Y’all be aight either way. Y’all tough right? Exactly. Anyway, it’s my favorite day of the week. While most of the world struggled to muster the energy to get out of bed before the second snooze was triggered, I’m up, showered, and ready to embrace the day. My last few blogs have been quite serious in tone, devoid of humor or fuckery. Well, let’s just say that I can’t make any guarantees about today’s blog. The best I can do is tell you the same thing Ray Charles Robinson told Steveland Morris Wonder before he passed – we shall see.
A year ago this time my brother Marcus Boogie Davis from Medina (that’s Brooklyn for you 85ers) hit my line and told me he’d meet me at the Barclays Center for the semifinals of the Atlantic 10 conference tournament. Boogie was OD excited to see then Dayton Flyers sensation Obi Toppin, son of Obadiah “Dunkers Delight” Toppin, a fellow Brooklynite and streetball legend. I was like “bet!” off jump. I couldn’t wait for the chance to get drunk and talk my shit while our boy Obi styled on whomever advanced to play Dayton, a top 5 team last season and overwhelming favorite to win the conference tourney. Shit, they were a lot of analysts’ prohibitive favorite to win the whole damn dance. As fate and history would have it, we never got the opportunity to see Obi that Friday night in Kings County. COVID shut the A-10 tourney down like a NYC bath house in the ‘80s. Not being able to congregate with the bro and see a future star get busy sucked ass. Little did we know that our world would be on pause for the better part of an entire year…
Fast forward to present day. I, Mr. Monday, a college basketball fanatic since the late ‘80s, have not been able to find my usual exuberance this season, and the only “excuse” I can find is the lack of fans in attendance. Ironically, the lack of fans at pro sports venues hasn’t really affected my viewership. In my eyes, they’re pros (obviously). I’d have the EXACT same excitement for viewing a Nets/Lakers game broadcast live from Thomas Morgan Gymnasium, home of the mighty Dwight Morrow Maroon Raiders, as I would watching it broadcast from Barclays. If I’m not actually at a pro game, I’m not that concerned about the crowd. The fans don’t really affect my perception of a pro game in any sport. But they do in college. I just can’t get into watching college ball played in empty gymnasiums. The fans give their home gymnasiums an advantage that can overwhelm opponents coming in from out of town. Without them, the games have an AAU tournament feel to them, at times almost pedestrian. Ain’t the same without the Cameron Crazies or having to go out west and trying to win one in The Pit (nostalgic reference). Fans give the sport life.
This lack of excitement for college sports has seriously diminished my viewership this season. I’m usually champing at the bit around Thanksgiving for the preseason invitation tournaments more than I am for the bird and stuffing, and I’m a fat nigga. It’s my opportunity to get an early look at all of the past year’s prep gawds that I’ve read about and seen on YouTube. I also like to get a peek at the teams that have a serious chance of cutting the nets down in early April. But this season, outside of watching Cade Cunningham and Oklahoma State (freshman phenom and the projected #1 pick), Gonzaga (who really might do it this year), the North Jersey kids (lil Ron Harper and Jahvon Quinerly, namely), my guy Penny and his Memphis (State, damn it) Tigers, or in passing flipping through channels, I haven’t watched the game nearly as much as I have in years past. But…it is conference tourney time. The big dance kicks off next week. Let’s see if I can get that old thing back.
Much respect to the Greek Freak, but Giannis WAS NOT the MVP of last night’s NBA All Star Game in my eyes. Yes, he went perfect from the field (16-16). But he had like eight layup line dunks, 35 uncontested layups, and he banked the three he made (this ain’t horse MF). I’ve seen more D in a 40 and over basement church league. That shit looked like playing 2K on Pro level. I should know. I play on Pro level. Chef Curry and/or Dame Lillard deserved the MVP last night. They put on a shooting exhibition for the ages. I also put a vote in for CP3 and those 16 dimes he dropped. The lil guys sell tickets. No one really cares about a 6’12” super athlete uncontested dunking throughout the contest. Now, if this were back in the day and those boys were out there hurking and lurking (Oakley/Mason, the Davis boys, Laimbeer/Rodman, etc.), I’d respect it. You’d need a helmet and mouthpiece to attack the rim. But today’s NBA is Candyland (which isn’t always a bad thing). Ain’t no risk in taking it to the Baja. And the All Star Game is MUCH worse. No one attempts to play defense until clutch time. And Zion, please tell your barber to clean and sterilize his clippers. Your below the chin/above the neck area really does look like the bottom of an unwrapped Nestle Crunch bar. Either that or you gotta eliminate something from your diet. It may be a combination. I’ve always said that you still get $5 haircuts from the one non-athletic scholarship Black homie from your old dormitory at Duke. And I’m certain you still eat 3pc breast combos AND a lake trout sammich from Tyrone’s at least 3.5 times a week. But the blogs are on you heavy. You’re worth a stack of paper. Get that shit taken care of. And Bron, that’s a real nice lace front you wore last night. It almost fooled me, until I saw you were still rocking the Tory Lanes in the back. Respectfully.
I’m very, very excited about the coalition of R & B heavyweights Anderson .Paak and Bruno Mars, who’ve formed a band dubbed Silk Sonic. Their new single “Leave The Door Open” is crazy. It’s a breath of fresh air in the current autotune era of hip hop and R & B. It’s reminiscent of that ‘60s sound. The two complement each other very well. It’s definitely grown folk material. I’m not sure if Gen Z can get with it. Y’all are not accustomed to hearing artists sing in natural voice. The lack of autotune may turn y’all off. But if you like good, natural R & B, look no further. Be on the lookout for “An Evening With Silk Sonic.” Soon come.
Republicans are under the impression that: a) raising the federal minimum wage from $.7.25 to $15.00 is nonsensical and b) a $1,400 stimulus check is an incentive for Americans to not want to return to work. Now, I could EASILY rip the Rs a collective new asshole, but that’s too easy. Any idiot with half a brain knows that both arguing points are ridiculous, so I won’t waste my precious time. I’m just bewildered that they are showing such incompetence when all data leads us to believe that they are way off tune with this one. More than 60% of the country was in favor of Sleepy Joe’s America Recovery Act. Why? Because most Americans have suffered greatly from the pandemic. Any type of nest egg (which most working and middle class folk can barely speak of) was depleted long ago. All stimulus and federal aid were necessitous. Single mothers suffered the most. When you add all those folk up from the poor to the working class to the textbook definition middle class, you have the majority of the U.S. population. Many are Rs. Rs that supported Sleepy Joe’s package. Yet, Rs in congress made the silliest of arguments to “support” their non-support of a package that will put money in the hands of the people who need it most – their constituents. If you ask me, Rs are making a very poor calculation. Midterm elections are less than 18 months away. There are plenty of senate seats on the ballot. This R strategy may very well backfire in their faces…big time. But I’m a take Ray’s advice. And I’m a just sip my black Earl Grey with honey and burn my reefa L.
Be on the lookout for #MNR hoodies and apparel. They’re on the way like a baby 36 weeks in their mama’s womb. We’re gonna keep flooding the streets with heat. Look out for the audio version of #MNR. I’m a get my Billy D. Colt 45 commercial on for y’all. Keep tuning into the podcast “Hope Somebody’s Recording This!” on your YouTube dial. We gon keep working. Trust.
#MNR: Keep Ya Head Up
“And since we all came from a woman, got our name from a woman, and our game from a woman. I wonder why we take from our women, why we rape our women, do we hate our women?”
I’ve been following the perils of New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo, son of former Gov. Mario Cuomo and older brother of CNN on-air personality Chris Cuomo. He is an eleven-year incumbent, elected in 2010 amidst the great recession that plagued the second term of former President George W. Bush. Cuomo first grabbed my attention politically with his no corporate tax for ten years for new business legislation, aimed directly at attracting new business to bolster a state economy ravaged by recession. As a native New Yorker, I immediately thought of the allure of new business in NYC, mostly retail and food. But I also had enough awareness to realize that this initiative could prove to be lucrative for all of NY, from Niagara Falls to the Roc to Buffalo to Cooperstown to Albany to Poughkeepsie to Y-O to Now Rule to Harlem to Syosset to Amityville to Bridgehampton to everywhere in between. I thought of the tech industry, how maybe this initiative could at least steal 15% of new business flocking to the Silicon Valley. I also thought of the fledgling green initiative (environmental business) potentially having a positive and significant impact on the empire state. To me (from a business standpoint), NY was a blank canvas and Cuomo was Bob Ross. The possibilities were endless.
Cuomo hasn’t been a Madden/2K 99 overall rating as governor, more like a smooth 91 or so. He hasn’t been squeaky clean, but until recently he’s remained largely unscathed. As expected, COVID hit NYC like a Tyson 1-2-1. It ravaged nursing homes. Numbers were grim (oh the irony). But Cuomo (seemingly) stood tall. He went toe-to-toe with tRump and didn’t even need to see his cut man between rounds. NY took the first major hit (watching news reports showing the trailers acting as makeshift morgues outside hospitals was a somber sight), but swift action helped numbers to fall exponentially. Cuomo received a lion’s share of the praise, even being hailed as “America’s Governor.” Not many (self-included) objected. But things change.
America has recently learned that Cuomo “juked” the data on COVID-related mortality rates of nursing home residents, to the point that even Deputy of Operations Rawls and Commissioner Burrell would blush (IYKYK). He even got my homegirl Tish James on his ass (New York State Attorney General Letitia James, I call her TiTi). As shitty as that is (smh), it ain’t the only blues he’s singing. America’s Mayor is also knee-deep in sexual harassment allegations, two to be exact. One claim is from former aide Lindsey Boylan. The other is from Charlotte Bennett, a 25-year-old executive assistant. I’m gon park the truck right there. Take the time to roll up if need be. I’m finna kick ass until both Foamposites turn shitty.
Boylan has accused the governor of making her feel uncomfortable through insensitive and “crude” comments and inquiries, including joking about playing strip poker. She also alleged Cuomo of giving her an unsolicited kiss on the lips. Bennett, who I will repeat is 25, accuses the governor of asking deeply personal questions during conversations. These conversations included a previous incident of sexual assault and whether she dated or would date older men. Gov. Cuomo shared that he was absolutely fine with dating anyone over 22. Andrew Cuomo is 63. I reiterate that none of these allegations have been substantiated. There has been no litigation. And to the uncouth, this seems to be nothing out of bounds. But the devil is a liar.
This is not a blog or forum to disgrace Gov. Cuomo. In the eyes of the law, he’s of yet done nothing illegal. In the eyes of politics, his next primary is over a year away, light years in the political realm, more than enough time to hurdle the allegations and proceed as if nothing was ever alleged. But this ain’t the fucking court of law. This is the MNR, a blog dedicated to truth, irrespective of how ugly or troubling it may be.
If you know me, you know that if I check you for some fuckery, it’s always and only after I’ve first checked myself. If I too am guilty of the same transgression, my words will be forthright. I’ll speak on how WE can overcome our collective fuckery. In my world, wrong is wrong. It doesn’t matter if I’m part of the wrong. My ass deserves to be on the chopping block as well.
I joked one time that if “me too” were a movement earlier in my work career, I probably would’ve had about 36 allegations. None would have been malicious (at least not in my eyes). I never illegally touched or forced myself on a female coworker. I never sexually harassed one, either. I have put my hands on female coworkers, always and only a pat on the shoulder. Of course, if that’s my folk, I probably hug her. But over the past few years, I’ve pondered whether even a pat on the shoulder is inappropriate. I will also admit that my conversation in the breakroom/lounge type setting may have been inappropriate from time to time. Never the Pornhub type, but more or less vintage Richard Pryor. Again, I ponder whether or not it was inappropriate. Sure, I got my share of laughs, but I never took the time to consider whether the ones who didn’t laugh felt a type of way. If they were, I was wrong. Plain and simple. Now, I know that the average caveman out there would argue against my point tooth and nail. There’s that old guard of male chauvinists and their successors that will never see it for what it really is. And then there’s that outright evil contingency that feels that any man who speaks against any type of workplace sexual harassment outside of rape is some type of closeted homosexual or effeminate male who’s been castrated by the world and feminism. They argue that speaking out against archaic principles always denotes the emasculation of the male. They really feel in their hearts that at the end of the day a man is superior to a woman. Some feel that the only true purpose of a woman is to reproduce and/or be used for a man’s sexual desires. Some equate the relative male advantage in physical strength to innately being proof of male superiority. But it’s all bullshit. I don’t give a fuck who you are. I stand on what I say. Fuck you and I’m available if you feel some type of way. You’re wrong ANY time you make a female coworker feel uncomfortable. She has a right to work in peace. It doesn’t matter how you feel about it. It matters how she feels about it. The same grace should be afforded to men. NO one at work should be made to feel uncomfortable by the opposite sex. Now back to Cuomo.
Andrew, you’re the type of motherfucker I can’t stand. You’re a very intelligent man. You know how to toe the line in a transparent manner that we can see from a mile away. If and when pinched, you (and others) can simply contend that you’ve done nothing illegal, which you haven’t (as of yet/per lack of litigation). In your elitist, narcissistic, and warped mind, you think that by doing it this way, you can: game your way into some pussy, lean on (brodie) a subordinate for some pussy, or fall into some pussy through privilege. This game has been in effect for millennia, and it’s tired. It’s the very essence of the casting couch. A man, whether through gender, physicality, stature, or leverage, can influence/intimidate/force/COERCE a woman into a sexual favor. When a powerful man brings sex into the mix, whether innuendo, suggestion, or outright solicitation, a woman (outside the working girls) is always put into the most fucked up scenario of Catch-22 possible. They say no and keep their dignity but risk losing their job/career. They say yes and risk losing their dignity and respect. It isn’t easy if you’re the fry girl who has aspirations of one day being assistant manager. Now, imagine if you were an aide to the governor of the state of New York. Refusal of a sexual advance can mean losing your position and being politically ostracized (Boylan is running for Manhattan borough president) or outright destroyed. An acceptance can mean losing your dignity and self-respect, not to mention the respect of your peers if and when your tryst is leaked. And to add shit to the shitstorm, it doesn’t even guarantee the promotion or boost. MF like Cuomo know exactly what corner they force women into when they do what he’s been alleged to have done. But I really don’t think they understand the trauma they put a woman through. And fuck you if you think I’m on some type of crusade. It’s the truth. Imagine all your career goals potentially resting on whether or not you suck a dick or fuck your boss? You went to school for all those years. You worked your whole ass off. You sacrificed damn near everything. You proved yourself in the lecture halls and on all the internships and jobs up to this point. You know that you’re worthy. But it all comes down to accepting your boss’s invitation to his hotel suite on the last night of the business trip, for which you worked 55-hour work weeks the last month in preparation. You have aspirations of being a junior partner. Yet, it all comes down to whether or not you fuck a 63-year-old creep and stick your finger up his ass. This is a fucked-up world. Now, ponder the fact that many women endure some form of this for a good portion of their lives. Most are forced to endure in silence, quietly being traumatized in the process. As shitty as it sounds, it is still commonplace. But like most things, it’s largely subtle.
We’ve read about the subjection of women since John Stuart Mill. It’s endured since the beginning of time. But like I said earlier, wrong is wrong. Change is imperative. I always ponder whether a MF who treats women like this could have lived with knowing his mother was bent over the desk twice a week by her boss to keep her secretary job when he was in Head Start. I ponder how that same MF would react if he found out his daughter sucked her Corporate Law professor’s dick for an influential recommendation to a prestigious law school. I hate any MF who uses his power or influence to sway the outcome of anything. I despise a MF who does it to a woman for sexual purposes. Gov. Cuomo, if you are in fact guilty, I hope they tar and feather you right beside the statue of your guy Columbus on 59th Street. FOH.