#MNR: America’s Most Blunted
“I smoked with a lot of college students. Most of ‘em wasn’t graduating, and they knew it…”
Sheeeittt, Red never made his way to Huntley Hall 1996-2000 era. I woulda disproved his theory. Salute to all the booda champs from that time and place in history. We had a time.
Salute to the state of New Jersey and our ugly ass, mole faced governor, Uncle Phil Murphy. The vote to legalize cannabis came from we, the voters, but Uncle Phil’s cheerleading played a key role in pushing the vote in the affirmative. The idea of legalized recreational marijuana has long since been a hot topic in the garden state, pretty much since medical marijuana use was approved in 2010. But every time the bill for recreational use came up down Trenton, those south Jersey card carrying Klan members who moonlighted as state politicians blocked that shit like how Kenyon Martin used to send shots into the eighth row in the Izod Center. One dumbass even stated that he voted no because it would definitely lead to mass marijuana-impaired auto accidents on the state roads and highways. Thee fuck??? Bitch, that line of reasoning has a hunnit fallacies. But I’ll break a couple down. First, we all know that with ANY machinery, operating while impaired is a strict no-no. You can’t operate a forklift at work while impaired. You can’t drive a Greyhound from Port Authority to D.C. while three sheets to the wind. Employing that logic is like saying prohibition should still be in full effect because everyone will always choose to just get drunk as fuck and drive to Wal Mart or to work or to wherever. Of course, some people are going to drink and drive. Some are going to L ride. It is what it is. But if you buy the ticket, you ride the ride. We knew that L riding back in the day could be the fastest way to a precinct, so we were OD careful. I’m just saying, it kinda had the opposite effect on judgement. Anyway. How about the marijuana users who don’t drive or operate heavy machinery at all? Should they too have to suffer?
Everything I’ve written since mentioning the state politician has been pure bullshit, just like the politician’s reasoning. You already know what it is. He didn’t want the bill passed because he figures the majority of non-medical users are Black and/or lowlifes. He’s fully aware of how much the state has profited off of marijuana litigation, incarceration, probation, and “rehabilitation.” He also knows that many lives have been ruined over a blunt or a dime bag of reefa. Marijuana criminalization was one of many surefire ways to keep the boot of the oppressor on the Black man’s neck. He and his Klansman brothers and sisters know we love our reefa, so they made sure to play it as close as possible for as long as possible. But the cat’s been out of the bag. Marijuana isn’t Diet Heroin. It’s not the friendly alternative to cocaine. It’s a natural plant. That’s where I give mole faced Phil his credit. He spoke on the disproportionate number of African American offenders in the state. And after the bill got shot down in Trenton, he put it in the hands of the voters. We spoke. Now, he needs to carry it all the way out and ensure that records of all past non-violent and non-distribution “offenders” are expunged. Thanks Phil.
You still fucked up on authorizing that six-week extension for emergency unemployment relief. You held out as a political ploy to piss Trump off, only to accept it weeks later. Your excuse for wanting to understand the ins and outs was lame. The average reader figured it out the first time it was explained. In the meantime, New Jersey workers suffered. Eat a dick and fuck your politics.
Light your shit up if you haven’t already. If you haven’t done the math yet, this is one of those. The cold intro should have let you know off jump ball. But y’all didn’t go to school to be journalists.
I refuse to succumb to peer pressure and throw two point fo’ grizzles in my Backwoods. You rappers hurt MF self-esteem with these logs y’all burn in front these camera lenses. Y’all got MF clowning respectable sized blunts in public. If I’m smoking from the top of the tree, I don’t need to stuff the L like I’m being interviewed on No Jumper or just finished a rap battle and I’m talking to Uncle Ra or Knowledge. Plus, 95% of my ciphers take place during by myself meetings. One to one point fever in the wood is good enough for me. On the flip side, you niggas twirling these anorexic L’s should just cop an old school pack of Bamboo or strictly take bong rips. In the spirit of my brother Guzi Gav (one love), that’s not even enough weed for one grown man. I really hope you don’t emulate this atrocity when amidst a cipher. The boys might clown your ass smooth outta town.
Once a year, I twirl a couple of dem thangs and play Redman’s Dare Iz a Darkside album from front to back. In my opinion, it is the ultimate rap weed album. Sure, there are plenty of marijuana themed albums. The Chronic may be the best album ever made. But while it and many other great albums have been marijuana themed, few were an actual ciph. Dare… is an end-to-end blunt session vibe. Def Squad, like Dre, were heavily influenced by Parliament, and the Funkadelic vibes are the backbone for their respective sounds. But Red and Erick Sermon took it a step further. It was more than the sound. They brought the actual cosmic slop to rap. Even the album, which shows Redman’s screaming head with blowout afro poking out of dirt, is a direct reference to Funkadelic’s Maggot Brain album. Few will argue that it’s Red’s best album, but many (self-included) will claim it to be their favorite Redman album. The irony is that Red hates the album and almost never performs any tracks off the project. He even went on his album radio promo telling listeners in every city that unless they were true Redman fans that they shouldn’t buy the album because it wasn’t for them. The only two singles, “Can’t Wait” and “Rockafella”, wouldn’t even be considered as singles by any record company today. The latter track was named after his homie who got murdered shortly before Red recorded the project. A brief clip of Rockafella flowing made up the intro to the actual track. That man was nice. RIP. Red also admitted that at the time he had a serious cocaine habit on top of his love affair with booda. The entire project was indicative of Red’s mind state: dingy basement funk, heavy baselines, and boom bap. Few, if any, can do it like the E Double and Red, whether it’s incorporating random sung R&B lyrics at the end of a track, sampling their own vocals (they were innovators with this), or manipulating vocals. Then there’s the list of guest artists. Of course, there’s the squad: E, Keith Murray, and Hurricane Gee, but there’s also Dr. Trevis and Uncle Quilly, two of Redman’s “characters” on the album. Some even consider Dare… to be a concept album. It really is a nonstop trip to the dark side. Mind blowing to this day. If they only used the remix beat for the original “Rockafella”.
Dare Iz a Darkside is a sentimental favorite because it’s the first CD I ever owned and came with the first CD player I ever owned, Christmas 1994 to be precise. But I already had a dub copy of the tape. Hip-hop aficionados remember the actual Dare… tape to have been red, thus the reason for it being called the red tape. The CD case and CD were also red. I had also started smoking weed the summer just before my 16th birthday, and it was one of the first great releases from then on that year, along with Squad mate Keith Murray’s debut The Most Beautifullest Thing in This World and his tag team partner Meth’s solo debut Tical. I’d sneak and smoke my blunt and then hit play. Those were the best days. The innocent days. I miss those days.
That’s my time y’all. I hope you enjoyed this blog along with your late night or early morning “constitutional”. UnB know the slang. Salute to crew member Steff Po @STEFF_23_ROZZAY. Love to the world. Squad up.