“Laying low with a bottle, I’m blowing circles. My state of mind purple.”
I’m laying low in the cut as usual, like a lion lying in the brush peeping everything in his proximity. I just ate so I may let you pass. But if you disrespect, I’m on that ass. Blunted.
Speaking of blunted, why is there like a national shortage of Russian Cream Backwoods? You gotta go to Seb’nleb’n or a smoke shop for a consistent stockpile. This is the part where I insert a shameless plug for ShopRite Liquors of Englewood. Their Backwoods prices are the best in town. But I’m not able to get there on the regular. I live with the white folks in Somewhere, Bergen County. But even my local shop has been running low lately. And I’m quite certain I’m the one buying half their merch. Shit, I even went online like fvck it, I’m a cop a box from a wholesaler. I went on every site Google suggested in the search. Every site is sold out of Russian Cream. (Sighs) Sweet Aromatics it is.
I hate to be that guy, but COVID is back on the rise around much of the country, including New York (and NY is on the cusp of the return of indoor dining). I was in Crispy Crust yesterday for a couple slices when another patron came in with no mask on. I looked at that nucca like he had three herpes bumps on his bottom lip. I did a quick Temptations slide step to the right and tried not to stare at that cotton-picking Negro. My right leg almost started shaking. I woulda shanked him if I had a banger on me and we were in the Four Building on Rikers Island. But I stayed cool and put some garlic powder on my slices. Luckily, he’d called in his order and just needed to pay and bounce. Soon as he bounced everything was cool again. I left out doing the George Jefferson walk across the Ave, holding up traffic like Earl when he on one. In addition, I’m watching a recap of a T-Top battle in Flavorville, North Carolina. The shot was tight and fairly brief, but I saw enough nuccas to make a Tarzan movie. There was not even the thought of social distancing. People drinking, smoking, yelling, talking noise, laughing. Spit flying all around a poorly ventilated room of overheated Black folk. I was so shook I took two COVID rapid tests back to back immediately after. Fuckouttahere. But all jokes aside, this isn’t a laughing matter. People are still perishing daily. We’ve already lost 200K. I don’t wanna bust your groove. I just want you to be careful. Life is precious. But you motherfakers are gonna do what you wanna do. Just be safe.
I’m still a bit taken aback when I see MF clique jumping. And no, I’m not talking on some young boy shit. I’m using clique as a generic term for any team, partnership, crew, gang, squad, etc., from the boardroom to the streets. I’m not one to judge another individual. But I do take meticulous notes. And when I see a MF consistently in diverse circles, it makes me skeptical of your intentions and you in general. I’m not talking about business purposes or just being friendly and showing love. Those two reasons are solid. But when I saw you with the Joneses last month and you’re with the Smiths this month AND the Joneses don’t fvck with you like that anymore---let’s just say I’m about zero percent likely to fvck with you on any level other than in passing. I know your type. You’re with whomever is up or appears to be up. You have no genuine folk. You’re a renegade. My third eye discerned and I keep at least one of my physical eyes on you at all times. No, we can’t start an LLC together. No, you can’t get my plug’s mathematics. And no, I’m not gon hook you up with my sis. She’s not interested.
Stop paying the white man regular price, the resell man an astronomical price, and stepping to your folk for a discount with their product. If anything, you tip your folk on top of paying what the cost is. Why do some MF make it a point to always try to shortchange their folk? Now, I can’t hate on a frugal person. They clip coupons. They dig through bargain barrels. They use no-frills laundry detergent. Their entire existence revolves around saving pennies. I don’t blame them. It’s nothing nefarious with them. But it burns my biscuits when I see a MF try to get over on their folk. It’s disgusting. You support your folk whenever you can. You don’t only pay the asking or retail price, you cop two, tree dem. And if you don’t have the means to support them financially, that’s cool. Don’t be discouraged. We can all respect the struggle. But you support them vocally every chance you get. If someone needs something done related to your folk services and you hear about it, open your fvcking mouth. Throw that alley. We know your broke ass is on social media all damn day. How about a repost or retweet? How about two? Stop shortchanging your folk while at the same time breaking your bank account to line the white man’s pockets. Punk ass MF. Jealous ass, sedentary MF.
IT’S HOODIE SEASON! I SAID IT’S HOODIE SEASON! After you read this blog, check us out on Twitter or IG @crewunb. The Unbearables have fly and unique hoodies available right the fvck now. Cop one for you, one for your baby mama, one for your wife, one for your auntie, and three for your chillen. Take a pic and send it to us. We appreciate all your support, as well as the support of all our VIP members like T-Mack dem. Love, infinite.
After you cop your hoodies, stop by my site, tymonday.com. There you can find links for all my works of art, as well as a glimpse into my life. I’m just a blessed Black man working hard for the hunnit grand times a hunnit grand. Time to shake a leg and get up in the wind, sugar. One love.