Ty Monday Returns
Peace to colored folk of all nations. White folk, too, unless you belong to the Klan or one of those military separatist groups in the Midwest. It’s been a long time since I’ve blessed the masses with my own brilliant blend of common sense, borderline insanity, and blissful ignorance, but I didn’t forget how to ride the bike. Put your helmets on; the ride may get a bit bumpy.
DISCLAIMER: THE VIEWS OF TYMONDAY ARE IN NO WAY TO BE PERCEIVED AS THOSE OF THE UNBEARABLES CREW. IT IS MEANT FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY, AND IS THE BLESSED FREEDOM OF THE FIREST AMENDMENT. IF YOU DON’T LIKE WHAT I SAY…FUCK OFF.
Now that we got that out of the way, how in the fuck did Mackelmore win the Grammy over Kendrick? I’ll wait…
Oh, I just remembered, I don’t give a flying 757 Boeing jumbo jet fuck about the Grammys, or any other award show for that matter. IDGAF if it’s the NAACP or Kids Choice Awards. But Mackelmore winning over Mr. Good Kid, M.a.a.D. City? You can’t in any way, shape, or form possibly be serious.
The Following is the most brilliant show I’ve seen in some time, perhaps since The Wire, perhaps Community. It’s well written and hauntingly appealing, but I still hate Kevin Bacon for ass raping those little Hell’s Kitchen boys in Sleepers, even if they did put about ten rounds in his ass in that restaurant. I couldn’t sleep the night I first saw the movie and it still leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Of course, monkeys, I realize it was just a movie. But still…
I read some punk ass online publication that rated Fab’s S.O.U.L. Tape 3 a shitty 6.3 out of 10. Really, dude? 6.3? You Nuevo-pseudo music aficionados kill me with your pompous and overly scrutinized criticisms nowadays. It’s like the in-thing now is to critique a piece of material to death for no apparent reason. Look, all I know is my own personal litmus test coupled with the reaction from social media. Errbody and they mama love ST3. It’s at least an 8.7. Thim Slick and Situationships alone make it a 7. Stop career hating you punk ass critics.
That’s all…for now. But expect much more to come. We’re on a quest for the big payday, and we’re going to do whatever we gotta to get there. King of styles, man, king of styles…
Follow me on the Twitter, @tymonday, because I’m the shit. Send all love/hate mail to email@example.com. 100 Blocks Stories, my first published work of fiction, is available on amazon.com.